Monday, 8 January 2018

That 2017 stress...

Stress is the root of so much bodily malfunctioning and harm.

Back in 2007 I went through a year of tremendous stress in my personal as well as professional life.

It culminated in a visit to my doctor which resulted in an MRI scan and a consultant who told me I had MS in early 2008.

I changed my life around, started The Telephone Laughter Club, left my rather dysfunctional relationship a year later after trying to ignore the breakdown of the relationship, and I decided to be happy with my daughter and focus on good things instead of being stressed out about money I did not have, I spent what I earned and was happy with what was left.

Falling in love again was wonderful.

Sometimes it is not enough to be in love and be happy for yourself and in yourself, if everything else is stressful and is ‘out to get you’, sometimes that is sadly what happens and what gets you down.

So 10 years later 2017 happened.

A year with so many ups and downs and downs that were true downs from my own dramatic point of view. The year was full of my dramas in my life. I felt people were truly out to get me.

Get real – no one is out to get you! Seriously, how self-absorbed can one person be and I laughed at myself.

Although, it felt that way because no matter what I did of good for myself and others I had verbal rubbish blasted back at me to the extent I thought I was losing it but I wasn’t. I was just considering it all from a very human perspective. It stressed me.

But all is good that ends good and if you can laugh at yourself in stressful situations then you are already miles ahead!

If you love yourself everything and anything is enough. Yet sometimes your world can be shaken. Other people cannot be fixed by your own good intentions and good wishes.

Change has to come from the self.
  • If your ego is hurt your ego will hurt others. 
  • If your heart hurts you will comfort yourself and others. 

At least that is what I learned about myself and what is true for me.

If you cannot see your ego is hurt but think it is your heart then hurtful things will be communicated and expressed through the connection you make with the centre of your hurt bursting out. I never believed that bad and nasty things should be said in anger between people who love each other, friends or love partners, angry things perhaps but never deeply hurtful, untruthful things. The thing about this is that those very hurtful things are often a reflection of the person saying them and their own issues and personality. It doesn’t hurt less having this thought. When it is people you love and care about who say hurtful things it will affect you in some ways.

It took me almost a year to let it go, let go of fixing something that didn’t want fixing. And it happened in 2017 in all areas of my life.

It almost sounds like I have been upset and stressed for a year hahaha - I haven't I have simply been on a rollercoaster and laughter has been a great companion to help me see through the mists that at times seemed like thick pea soup. At the end of the day I am a jolly person and it takes more to truly push me off my path.

I let it go.

The impact of stress on our wellbeing cannot be dismissed in any way. We all know this because we are constantly bombarded with stress relief messages, exercises, medication, events, gurus etc. because we all know what stress can do to us or how we can make stress our negative companion.

My only say in this matter is, listen to your own body wisdom.

Don’t take other people’s word for it because they DO NOT KNOW what it is like for you. And they may call your stress a nervous or mental breakdown when in fact it is just going through some tough dealings and you handle it the way you do without breaking down. The things that cause people to ‘decide’ you are breaking down may be the fact you swear a bit more, you speak a bit less, you seem more introvert, or you may even rage more.

It is human to let emotions out and it is human to seek solitude when things are causing deep reflection.

None other than yourself knows what it is like being you so don’t let someone judge you and do not take their word for granted. Respect yourself and move on with your honesty and integrity intact.

In 2017 my health was impacted by this stress. Almost a decade to the date.

I continue to believe that MS is a myth of the past for my life but I also know that when the immune system suffers through the constant pressure of stressful events there is no guarantee it doesn’t hit you in some physical, emotional or mental way.

No matter what the stress brings with it – there is always laughter, love and nice deserts to be had.

Laughter got me through many challenges in the past and I continue to enjoy telephone laughter with lovely people who are on the same 7am laughter wave, deserts and wonderful people far and near are not to be underestimated either.

Life is life!

Nothing is going to stop me and no one is going to break me.

I share laughter and Laughter Yoga because it creates instant change. I have been accused of many things over the years including being all about the money and those who have made those decisions about me are wrong – it only shows how little they have listened over the years and how little interest they actually had in finding out who I am and what I am about. You cannot work together if you have no interest in knowing who you work with - especially not in Laughter Yoga where connection is key.

My life’s mission is to share laughter because it has a real positive impact on us, our health, our connections, our ability to cope, and when you share it honestly, truthfully, authentically and in integrity then you cannot be someone you are not.

You cannot pretend anymore.

It is no one’s fault that my health got a kick in 2017 – if I wasn’t invested in my work with a real passion I would just have ignored everything and gone into hiding. But I DO care, I care about the people who have trusted me as their teacher and I care about those who have decided that I am no longer worth their time. Love was there when we met and I will never change my heart.

My physical health experienced a set back because I didn’t honour myself and didn’t look after my own self, I let other people’s negative energies get the better of me - AND it didn't kill me!

As simple as that.

I will probably never change so I will probably do it all again.

However, I know who my people are and I know we are in it together supporting each other and loving people and positive change. I have not had a nervous or mental breakdown regardless which whisperers are whispering. I do not need anyone telling me I need help. I have the best help in the world inside me and around me – as we all do. I cry, I laugh, I scream, I quieten – it is not having a breakdown, it is being human.

My world is created by my word and my outlook, and I am done with negative ‘impacters’. Besides...

...it is none of my business what happened in the opinion of others anyway but slagging others off behind their back is NOT okay and that IS my business when it is about me and when people avoid saying things to my face about me, to me. More so laughter is my business and I am here for and with those who are up to something with laughter and Laughter Yoga.

Laughter cannot be separated from my life.

Challenge me!

When I allowed the opinions and the hurtful egos of others to have their effect it shook me up and it is the same for everyone when we let stress get to us. It is detrimental to our health.

Growth happens when we learn from our experiences and apply the lessons of life. There will always be someone behind you disagreeing or disrupting  when you are committed to move forward for the good of everyone because we all have our own pace of learning in life and ideas are individual not always to everyone's liking.

The important message in this is…

Remember yourself, your tribe, your people, your chosen and your blood.

And remember your body is awesome and it is also so complex that it does not know right from wrong and will do what it does best, react to the energy and release what is suitable in the given situation.

So, make sure you feed it love in all thoughts, words and actions.

I got spirited away…and now my body tells me it is missing my care and attention.

Remember who you are.

I remembered who I am on 31 December 2017.

And now I am off to indulge on B12 and D vitamins along lots of laughter to support a healthy and strong immune system and life spirit - 2018 is already a dance with life!

3 comments:

Suzy J West said...

Great article. So uplifting. And you're right - it's important we all listen to ourselves. That we don't take other people's words as though they are our own reality. We all have our own, sometimes very different, realities. Being aware of this helps.

Unknown said...

Sikke en dejlig historie. Jeg kan i høj grad relatere til den.
Kh Anders

Unknown said...

Sikke en dejlig historie. Jeg kan i høj grad relatere til den.
Kh Anders