Monday, 11 February 2013

Rock, paper, scissors?

There is a story to this picture...
In a world where achievements and hard work still measure high on the scale of success it can be hard to be a single parent. There are so many tasks to juggle and a household to manage all alone and things may seem to pile up to unimaginable hights where it is all about work, work, work whether in the workplace or at home, socialising or shopping.

[eeerrrrkkkk] That is a brake sound btw...

You are absolutely right if you think that is not Lotte's words! I rarely use negative words and when I do, it is only to make a point - which is approaching...

Here we go!

Yes, it can be a challenge, but it doesn't have to be tough and hard! And, yes, I have been through all the words in the dictionary describing the challenges and negatives of being all aloneeeeeee.

Stop for a moment if you are indulging in the downside of being a single mum or single dad or just single, and think about all the positives! You may need to search your mind or you may be reminded the minute you read the words - STOP! and think.

This blog post does not only relate to single parents but also to people who feel lonely being without a partner or for any other reason feel lonely.

The only place there is loneliness is in our own minds and it is driven by our egos and the should-be's and should-have's!

You may think that is a bit harsh but just try and chew on it for a moment and really indulge and taste what it actually means to you. Then imagine if you had it all there, companionship and everything you dream of, then there would be no sense of feeling lost and lonely.

Guess what!? It really is right there, in yourself, when you let your ego along with how things should be in order for you to feel complete and not so alone - then, in that space, you are complete!

We are totally complete in ourselves.

It doesn't mean there won't be challenges and things to get through, but finding the peace inside is what makes everything else doable, achievable and overcomeable. There is ALWAYS a choice.

Sometimes other people will try and get the better of you but when you know your own strength and your inner place of peace then these people will slowly become fewer and you will surround yourself with like-minded people. Hold on to the hardship and I guarantee you that you will have a crowd of followers who are ready to support you in how tough it is!

Lots of people say to me something like 'it's easy for you because you're always so happy' - - - - - oh, really? I'll repeat myself: There is ALWAYS a choice!

Being a mum by myself with wonderful friends who know about love and passion as well as going the extra mile is fantastic.

They have positive outlooks and we help and share whatever needs sorting - and I feel blessed that I have such amazing support, I hope they know it works both ways.

Furthermore, I run my own business and that is a huge blessing in terms of flexibility to accommodate young peoples' self-centered needs and requirements (said in the most loving of ways) and I know that this is not an option for all single-ists but for me it is a true blessing and a choice I made a long time ago. However, there is more to it than just being flexible when you run a business.

This is not an attempt to glorify myself, all I'm saying is that there are choices of how we are in our lives - whether we are running everything on our own or have a partner to share it with. And of course some of us are blessed with uplifting relationships, love and a supportive family but loneliness is not always about being alone.

It is all about resourcefulness and knowing there is something more important at stake - that it is not always and not only about you! Keep looking at yourself and it's all you will ever see. Step away from the mirror or hardship or impossibilities and...

So what will it be? Rock, paper, scissors?

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